Did you hear Floyd Mayweather?s new ring entrance music?
The lyrics go a little something like this:
?Hi, ho, hi ho, I ain’t nobody’s ho but I owe, I owe, so it?s off to work I go.?
It’s to a rap beat and his buddy, Fifty Cent, will be throwing his hands in the air like he just don’t care which I am sure he doesn’t.
I hear Don Ho, the “Tiny Bubbles” man, is unavailable to sing background.
Some of his neighbors have taken to–behind his back, of course–calling the boxer “L’il Stinker” instead of “L’il Floyd” but let me explain why.
Btw, I think any 32 year old man who is referred to as Little anything should be a midget, don’t you? And truncating Little to the irritating “L’il” just makes it even more childish.
PBF considers himself in a (low) class by himself when it comes to trash talking but evidently Floyd Mayweather Jr. won?t pay the guys who haul it away.
The AP went through some public records and discovered that, despite all the huffing and puffing by Money May and his Sancho Panza Laughing Lenny Ellerbe, that the flashy fighter owes almost $6.5 million dollars in federal and New Jersey state tax liens. Included in that total is a $193,000 tax bill to New Jersey and home association fees.
But my personal favorite PBF obligation is the $320.10 he has ?stiffed? his garbageman for.
I don?t know how fragrant Mayweather?s refuse is but that really stinks.
That?s hard work, lifting those garbage cans. If Mayweather does not get current, he might have flash back to when Mookie threw the trash can through the plate glass window at Sal?s Pizzeria in Spike Lee Joint, ?Do The Right Thing.? You know, Manny Pacquiao does things big. We could easily refer to him as Big Manny.
He went big in handing a beating to elderly and infirm Oscar De La Hoya.
Pacman came up big in turning Hatton in Flattened in six minutes of slinging leather.
But what about L?il Floyd?
He does things L?il, I see.
He had a L?il rib injury causing his July 18 bout against crybaby Juan Manuel Marquez to be pushed back to Sept. 19.
Or did he? As I wrote Thursday, was that just a L?il fib by Mayweather and partners in crime Golden Boy?
He has a Li?l tax problem but apologist Ellerbe, who makes some harebrained reference to actor Wesley Snipes going to the slammer for not paying taxes, keeps denying it is any sort of problem at all.
Easy for Laughing Leonard to say because it?s not his bank accounts or property the IRS can invade.
Owing $64 million, even when you supposedly have a $15 million payday looming, is no laughing matter, Laughing Lenny. I promise not to refer to your guy’s Juan Ma purse as “a haul” because that is what they do with garbage…when you pay your bill for this useful service.
I, for one, feel Mayweather?s financial pain and I am going to do something about it.
I hereby obligate myself to personally pay 10 percent of PBF?s in arrears trash collection tab?
I will phone you today, Mr. Ellerbe, and you can tell me where to send my money order for $32.10.
I just want to pitch in, to do my L?il part here.
Personally, I enjoy watching Mayweather?s hit and run ring style. Where I come, which is the old sweat box known as the New Garden Gym in Boston, we call it boxing. We call it the art of self defense and the Sweet Science.
But, at the same time, I realize many of you slugger crazy fans call it odoriferous.
So maybe his fights stink but there is no reason, if we all chip in a L?il bit, that Mayweather?s front yard and eventually the whole neighborhood has to stink as well.
Won?t you join the good cause?
Make your pledge to Stop Mayweather From Stinking and send it immediately if not sooner to [email protected].
It?s the hot season in Vegas, with sauna bath temps than can go as high as 120 Fahrenheit, and those piles of garbage can get really ripe.
That won’t be sweet sagebrush or desert roses Mayweather’s neighbors will be smelling.
Operation Clean Up Mayweather is underway. Either that or his neighbors will have to stock up on pins for their nose and some swine flu masks.
One place in Vegas you don’t want to live and that is down wind from the Mayweather mansion.
The sweet smell of excess?
FYI, all of you who asked.
(Laughing Lenny and former TV newscaster Linda Ellerbe are not believed to be related.)
