IT?S the final day in a series of marathon hearings on Civil Case no. PURSE 6040-5050 entitled ?Ricky Hatton vs. Emmanuel Pacquiao.?
Today?s proceedings are allotted for the final arguments for counsels of both litigants.
Court Interpreter: All rise?Honorable Judge Willford A. Price presiding.
Buboy Fernandez (whispering to Wakee Salud): All rice daw. Walang ulam?.. Steam rice lang sa akin.
Wakee Salud (aloud): No, I?m fine. I just had breakfast, your Horror este?your Honor.
Judge Price: Sit down Mr. Salud. Please proceed with your summation, counsel.
Gareth Williams (counsel for Ricky Hatton): ?Mr. Hatton is the best fighter in the junior welterweight division and currently holds the IBO diadem. He was the fighter of the year in 2005. ?
?His only loss came against Floyd Mayweather Jr., the top fighter in the sport before his retirement.
Since then, he has bounced back marvelously with wins over Juan Lazcano and Paul Malignaggi.?
?We reiterate that Mr. Pacquiao is not as big a draw in Las Vegas as his team would optimistically want to impress.
Pacquiao vs. Diaz is damning evidence of that, your Honor.
Ditto with his fights with Juan Manuel Marquez and Marco Antonio Barrera, which did not exactly rake in record pay-per- view numbers.
Ergo, his fight with Oscar de la Hoya was a pay-per-view success because of the Golden Boy.?
?Because of Mr. Hatton?s rabid fan base, he is the only boxer capable of turning a neutral venue like Las Vegas into a homecoming party.
?What we are seeking your Honor is just parity. For this reason, we believe that a 50-50 split is reasonable and fair under the circumstances.?
Atty. Jeng ?The Jackal? Gacal (counsel for Manny Pacquiao): ?Your Honor, the crux of our contention is simply this. Mr. Pacquiao is the bigger superstar between these two magnificent fighters and so parity is just not possible.?
?It is beyond issue that Manny is the best fighter in the world, pound-for-pound.
He is a two-time Fighter of the Year awardee and has won titles in five weight classes.
His recent destruction of Oscar de la Hoya has marked him as a true leviathan in the sport today. A 60-40 split in favor of my client is warranted.?
(After hearing both arguments, the jury is given an hour to deliberate.)
Judge Price: Has the jury reached a verdict?
Jury Foreman: We cannot, Your Honor. The jury is hung-over.
Judge Price: You mean the jury is hung?
Foreman: No, your honor. We are really hung-over. Last night, we accepted Mr. Hatton?s invitation to have a couple of pints over at his favorite pub.
Afterwards, we proceeded to Mr. Pacquiao?s hotel where he serenaded us with his Filipino hit song ?Para sa ?yo, (ang tagay na ?to)? over several last rounds, of course.
Judge Price: This is preposterous! Why was I not invited? er?Did I just say that?
At this point, Manny and Ricky who had been eyeing each other like tigers throughout the proceedings, start exchanging blows, much to the delight of those in attendance.
Judge Price: Order.. Order in the Court. Order I say!
Buboy, nudging Wakee: O, pwede na daw mag-order?
Bob Arum steps in attempting to break the two protagonists:
Not here, not here you two pint-sized cretins? Not for free?
It?s not a pretty sight. Afterwards, Manny looks like somebody teed off on his head using a baseball bat.
Ricky Hatton looks like he?s been run over by a diesel truck.
Judge Price: Because the fight has already taken place, the issues have become moot and academic. Case dismissed!
Arum: Aaarghh!!
Buboy: Sarap ng steam rice?
THE LAST ROUND.
It?s on my kumpare from Down Under who is here to celebrate a milestone, Atty. Ricardo ?Bambi? Rebollido. Pit Senor! ([email protected])
