Whoops! It seems I?ve stumbled upon a new and growing phenomenon: the Pac-freak. After I dared to suggest in a recent article that Manny Pacquiao (who I variously described in the piece as ?amazing,? ?sensational,? ?phenomenal? and ?extraordinary?) will lose his upcoming fight to Ricky Hatton, I got involved in a ?debate? with some highly intelligent (?) Pac-fans. Here?s a selection of their responses:
?Laugh now man….heheheheh! Your not going to laugh after the fight…….hehehehehe! Your an an idiot man…An idiot gay, whahahahahahah!?
??you are not a man but a half-man-half-woman. That’s what you are. Ohh yeah.?
?To me you look like a gay not only because of this article but also because of your face. Hahahahahahaha.?
Another suggested that I be ?put to prison? for miscalculating the Oscar De La Hoya debacle, adding that the ?British empire will start to crumble? if and when Hatton is beaten by the Filipino.
Well reasoned responses, all of them, and valuable contributions to the debate. Unfortunately, I can?t match their wit, or hope to construct an argument as astute or thoughtful as these palpable geniuses, but I would like to put forward some upcoming thoughts about the Pacquiao-Hatton matchup, even if by doing so I?m risking my freedom, gender, sexuality and possibly my life (not to mention the chances I?m taking with the British Isles, perched, it seems, on the brink of oblivion).
Such is the life of a writer, I guess.
I could of course slink back into my shell, decorate it pink, apply the lipstick, and own up that I was lying all along. No, really, I don?t think Hatton will win at all ? Manny Pacquiao is the greatest fighter who ever lived, always has been, and always will be. I agree with the recent contributor to this site who asked the question, quite seriously: could Manny defeat Nicolay Valuev (the seven foot tall, 300 pound, ?Beast from the East?)? His conclusion: Pacquiao ? on points. He reasoned that Manny might not carry his punch all the way up to heavyweight, so might have to settle for the long route. Sheer genius, that.
However, I prefer honesty, even if it gets me into a world of trouble. And part of what I do is to analyze boxers and matchups and to come up with, hopefully, a sustainable justification for predicting a particular course of events. I do it for fun, really ? it?s not meant to be political, or sociological, or biased, or a commentary on sexuality or the human condition; it?s certainly not intended to be the basis for the death of any particular nation or ethnic group.
So, I say, with humility and generosity, and acknowledging all my frailties as a human being ? Manny Pacquiao is going to get his ass-whipped by Ricky Hatton. Oh yes, that?s what I said ? Hatton will win inside distance in a fight that may not even be close, if the Hitman turns up fit, healthy and ready for action.
I say this not because I like the look of Ricky better than I like the look of Manny Pacquiao, although I do think he looks mighty cute in those tassled shorts, and not because the Mancunian is British, and so am I. I don?t even say it because Ricky Hatton is a better fighter than Manny Pacquiao, because I don?t think that he is. I say it because the Oscar De La Hoya contest taught us nothing about Pacquiao?s capacity to fight beyond the Lightweight limit. We would have learnt something about that had Oscar turned up in any kind of shape to fight.
So take the De La Hoya debacle away, and what are you left with? Pacquiao has had a single fight at 135 pounds, taking apart the earnest but very limited David Diaz, and before that was in the fight of his life against Juan Manuel Marquez at 130 pounds, a bout in which he was repeatedly knocked backwards by the little Mexican and deemed fortunate to earn a split decision.
I say it because Hatton will weigh 10 pounds more than Marquez did that night (in fact, probably even more post weigh-in). I say it because Hatton is demonstrably comfortable, and powerful, at 140, which is where the fight will be made, and has never been close to being beaten at that weight. I say it giving full respect to Manny Pacquiao?s speed, agility and guile ? having given the same respect to those qualities in Paulie Malignaggi, the last man to face the fearsome Hatton (I picked Malignaggi).
I say it because I worry for Pacquiao?s ability to take Hatton?s body shots, which are as perfectly constructed as any practitioner in the game today, and will carry the kind of weight that Manny will never have experienced. I worry having reviewed the tape of Manny?s early losses to Torrecampo and Singsurat, both 3rd round knockouts and affected with, yes, you guessed it, body blows. Sure, Pacquiao was younger, smaller, less effective, and rumor has it that he was battling his own weight issues in those contests. One thing is for sure ? Floyd Mayweather, SR., will not miss the opportunity to highlight perceived weaknesses in his own personal odyssey to uproot Freddie Roach as the world?s finest coach.
But hey, I could be wrong, and all kinds of factors could come into play on the night that knock my predicted outcome sideways. That?s the beauty of boxing, it?s unpredictability: without it, why bother turning up to watch?
So I?ve constructed an anti Pac-freak shelter in my back yard. I?ve locked all the doors and windows, and I?ve alerted friends and relatives to the distinct possibility that I may be wearing a dress from May 3rd onwards. Government forces are as we speak battening down the British Isles, lest they slip away into the sea this summer.
If Pacquio wins, I?ll eat my hat. I will do so smilingly and with good grace because you know what ? I don?t actually take myself that seriously.
Perhaps there?s a lesson in there for all of us.
