Gushing fan walks up to the great Groucho Marx. The scene is a hot and steamy restaurant in the Hollywood area. Maybe it was mid-July, maybe this story precedes air conditioning. Just follow the story?
?Hey, Groucho, I just want to say I am a big, big fan of yours,? Mr. Gushing says.
Marx unloosens his tie and shoots back, ?That?s good, son. If it gets any hotter in here, I can use a big fan!?
Meanwhile, don?t confuse colleague John Chavez with any Marxist philosophy or anecdotes. First of all, John thinks an anecdote is what those two twerps who got bit by the tiger at the San Francisco Zoo required and, secondly, John is still trying to figure out the Marx Brothers movie line in which His Grouchiness reports that he just shot a lion in his pajamas.
?How he got into my pajamas I will never know,? Groucho said.
?Who wears pajamas when they go hunting?? Chavez asked me. ?When I go duck hunting near Fallon, NV., I dress like a duck to fool my prey!?
Back to big fans. To kick off 2008, which had a sobering start for me for a change, I?ve decided to rate and rank boxing?s greatest fans. I?ve narrowed them to two categories, fans of a particular fighter or fans of a particular nationality.
So here are Boxing?s Fiercest Fan contingents and the reasons why. The ratings are not numbered in order of importance to the sport. They are just randomly numbered.
1?HATTONITES FROM THE UK, BABY?Three plane trips, three hotel rooms, three or four cases of liquid food (beer) per trip to Las Vegas to support the Only One Ricky Hatton during 2007. Dumbest suggestion of the boxing year may have been Lennox Lewis saying that Hatton should retire after getting pasted by Floyd Mayweather. Retire? Hatton?s loyalists put the fan in fantastic. I think Hatton should fight 20 more times and laugh all the way to the bank, old chap. Hatton has a knack of giving off an appearance of competitiveness even when outclassed as in the PBF bout. I repeat and renew my idea that Megamanny?s third bout of 2008 should be at 140 pounds against the Mancunian candidate. I think the Hattonites will, in the main, also be faithful fans be Amir Khan backers but not with the same fervor. For Hatton, they fly to Vegas. For Khan, the modest and moderate Muslim lad, they will lend support by turning on their TV sets and showing up in UK arenas. Only for Ricky will they travel overseas.
2?(SUBSET) ALL BRITISH BOXING FANS?Those who financially supported Frank Bruno through one loss after another and steadily backed Nigel Benn, Michael Watson, Chris Eubank. Add in the Joe Calzaghe backers, who came out 49,000 strong (excluding maybe 1,000 Danish Mikkel Kessler followers) in Cardiff in November, and don?t forget the Scotsmen who staunchly support their own pugilists. The Brits get behind a Henry Cooper or a Bruno and stay behind him through thick and thin. Interesting footnote is that Mike Tyson has long acknowledged that his wildest, most loyal fans are the British. Although he came to them having Jamaican roots and having won an Olympic gold medal for Canada, the Brits warmly embraced London-born Lennox Lewis as their own.
3—PINOY POWER BEHIND MANNY PACQUIAO, OTHERS?Filipinos have always been fight fans but there was a long dry spell between a Flash Elorde and the worldwide phenomenon Manny Pacquiao. Now the Pinoys can look at a rising son named Nonito Donaire and I am sure there will be many, many or should I say Manny, Manny more ring heroes to follow? One key difference I see between many of the Filipino fans and, for example, the Mexican boxing fans is the Mexicanos seem to have as a better appreciation for their opponents. Or maybe I?m just distracted by Internet loudmouths.
It is fair to say, though, that the Mexican fans have learned to love to ?hate? Pacman. In fact, I know some Mexicans who now root for Pacman to win even against their countrymen. I don?t say they do it loudly or openly but they do it. Would any sane Pinoy root against Megamanny except in the dark shadows of the chat rooms?
4?MEXICANOS UNIDOS?Mexico and the USA have, no doubt, produced the greatest world champions across the boards dating back to when Nat Fleischer was in a third grade. (Ask your grandfather who he was.) Though they have never had real superstars in the heaviest weight classes, Mexicans have so resolute as fight fanaticos that boxeo remains, from what I can, one of the true major sports in their country, behind futbol but ahead of baseball and other sports.
5?AMERICANS?I am pleaded to see, that through the passage of time and changes in attitude, that white fans support black and Latino boxers and that US fans just want to see the best fight the best. For example, I know De La Hoya lovers and De La Hoya haters. They cross the racial and religious spectrum. Ditto for Floyd Mayweather. There are some African Americans who detest PBF and that?s what makes for a boxing democracy.
6?BORICUA, BORICUA?The small island with the huge boxing history. Maybe Felix ?Tito? Trinidad does not want to pass the torch to Miguel Angel Cotto. Sorry to say this, Tito, but I think Cotto has already ripped it out of your aging hands. Cotto is a more than worthy successor to Trinidad just as Tito was a worthy successor to Bazooka Gomez, Wilfred Benitez, Jose Chegui Torres and all the rest. Now the nagging question, which will nettle Mayweather unless he says ?I do,? is whether Money May will step forward to fight the Puerto Rican banger. Mayweather may eat Chinese food but I hope he skips the duck sauce.
7?BROOKLYN FIGHT FANS?Are they New York?s best or is it just a myth? Brooklyn is in the house for Tyson, Briggs, for Bowe, for Judah, and now for Yo Paulie Malignaggi. Paulie is worth rooting for despite his toy gun power. He was once so poor that he used to sleep in a car outside Gleason?s Gym. Rags to riches? Not yet, but here?s hoping the likable, quotable Yo Paulie makes it to the riches part because he is a pure NYC slickster in the Hector Camacho mold. I don?t see Herman Ngoudjo as Malignaggi?s Edwin Rosario if you know what I mean.
Let me hear it. What did I get wrong? Who did I leave out? My intention, as always, is to insult everyone.
That?s a joke, son, like shooting the elephant who was in my pajamas.
