Manny Pacquiao has returned to the Philippines after a brief USA visit during which it was mentioned that he?s been invited to a big pro-am golf tournament at Lake Tahoe this summer.
Putting Pacquiao and golf in the same sentence made me laugh.
Now I know I could obviously never stay in the ring against the eight division world champion fighter. Pacman would never abuse his elders, would he?
And I admit Pacman would run me off the basketball court because ?the White Gorilla? used to go into games to give fouls when my Marley?s Madcaps team was terrorizing the Fordham Law School intramural league.
I led that league in one category, tripping opponents from behind.
Ditto for billiards. Pacquiao plays pool constantly and would run the table on me without breathing hard.
Ditto for another game he likes, darts. I?d be more likely to hit the bartender than the bullseye in that game which is second only to billiards at Pacquiao?s plush Gensan pool hall.
But, when it comes to golf, I am convinced that, although I?m lucky to break 100, Pacquiao would look like some weekend hacker competing against Tiger Woods in a match against me.
What?s my handicap, you ask?
I?ve got a three handicap, actually, meaning the clubs, the balls and those darned rules.
Oscar De La Hoya claims to be a scratch golfer and I hear he?s really good. On the other hand, Oskie?s spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on lessons.
Pacquiao wouldn?t need costly lessons.
As bad as I am, I would take him to school on the fairways and greens.
Three or four holes in and I?d have Pacman panting, ?Who?s your caddy, Daddy??
Let?s see if Pacman will play me, $100 per hole, with the proceeds going to the charity of his choice.
**********************
Shannon Briggs is an acquaintance, mainly by phone, of garrulous British heavyweight hopeful David ?Hayemaker? Haye.
Now retired, the two-time former world heavyweight champions doesn?t want to offend his own fans in England or Klitschko Brothers hotbed Germany so he?s not coming out and picking the soft-chinned but hard-hitting Haye to upset Wladimir on July 2 in their titanic battle in Hamburg.
But Briggs does like the cut of Haye?s jib and his bold, trashtalking demeanor.
?David and I spoke on this fight,? Briggs said Monday by phone from his South Florida office. ?David saw how I fought Vitali despite having only one good arm. He said he feels the guys the brothers have been knocking out are bums.
?David said my effort against Vitali inspired him. I told him he cannot stay at the end of Wladimir?s long jab. He?s got to cut the distance, get around that jab and go for the KO. He knows all that.
