When we were little kids, we were taught not to play with matches.
But matchmakers don’t have a choice, not if they want to make a living.
That reminds me of the old tag line to the print media ads for former heavyweight champion Jack Dempsey’s Times Square restaurant.
“Love matches are made in heaven, boxing matches are made here.”
Something like that, you get the drift.
I’ve been cogitating about some brewing matches and some that are already made and I want to opine about same.
AMIR KHAN VS. JUAN MANUEL MARQUEZ: Juan Ma’s manager-trainer, the great Dean of Mexican Boxing Igancio “Nacho” Beristain, is totally against this bout and I must agree. It doesn’t even make sense from Golden Boy’s selfish viewpoint. I know the Goldens are in lust with their newly-obtained Kid Khan but why risk the much smaller Mexican icon to polish up the Bolton Wanderer? Let’s say JMM gets drilled by Khan or just loses a onesided bout, what residual value would he have? Better to match Juan Ma more appropriately because I’ve a sneaking suspicion that he and Manny Pacquiao will get their series to trilogy status. Don’t say with one breath that Juan Ma is “El Numero Uno” of Mexico and then treat him like a sacricial lamb. BAD MATCH.
ANDRE BERTO VS. PAULIE MALIGNAGGI: I’m sorry, I like them both but the afterglow of Paulie’s excellent performance against fading Juan Diaz isn’t that warm. I really can’t fathom why Messrs. Haymon & DiBella would want this match. I just don’t see an aesthetically pleasing bout between these two, do you? Besides, Malignaggi is not, repeat not, a welterweight. BAD MATCH.
KERMIT CINTRON VS. SERGIO MARTINEZ: Now this is eminently sensible. Cintron would feather his nest if he can beat the Argentine toughie and vice versa. I’m licking my chops in anticipation of those two getting down, really, because no dancing will be permitted. EXCELLENT MATCH.
WLADIMIR KLITSCHKO VS. VITALI KLITSCHKO: The brothers must be deaf or else Wlad is too busy with his flyweight femme fatale, Hayden Paiettiere. Who can blame him? But is there any other heavyweight bout that matters? Well, David Haye against either K Bro would be acceptable but Cain Vs. Abel II is what the masses yearn for. BRILLIANT MATCH.
TIMOTHY BRADLEY VS. EDWIN VALERO: I don’t know what Bob Arum is smoking, mabe some cigarettes with no brand name or something. But Bradley is a Nightmare On Elm Street for the still somewhat mechanical Venezuelan. You don’t go from Antonio DeMarco to Bradley without something in between, a step up and not a leap into the abyss. I’m reminded of when poor Ron Stander was throwing in against Smokin’ Joe Frazier and his estranged wife was asked who would win. “You don’t run a Volkswagen in the Indianopolis 500 unless you know a helluva shortcut,” Mrs. S cracked. Arum is supposed to preserve Valero and the perfect, all by KO record under shrink wrap until he can toss him in with Pacman, isn’t he? DUMB MATCH FOR VALERO, DUMB, DUMBIE, DUMB.
