With the recent implosion of what would have been boxing’s biggest fight in decades, I was left wondering, what if I was HBO’s boxing tsar? Trigger the corny television dream sequence. I could see it, me sitting in Ross Greenberg’s office in New York, gazing out of my window at my vast boxing domain, taking home a high-six-to-low-seven-figure salary. There I was, calling the shots, making the fights that fans want to see, and bending the promoters to my will; the king of boxing. In the words of Mel Brooks, “It’s good to be the king.” That is until I was unceremoniously returned to reality; and the realization that I am not the king of boxing. No, I am but a lowly writer, an unwashed sans-culotte forced to feed and endure the deprivations of boxing’s first estate.
Burdened by the financial demands of a network that has grown fat on the guaranteed subscription fees and exorbitant pay-per-views, squandering its wealth on audacious purses and television rights, a revolutionary seed was planted in my mind. Why not me? Why must boxing’s version of Louis XVI continue to reign, when there is any number of would-be Napoleons toiling away? I now humbly submit my case for why I should assume Ross Greenberg’s throne.
From a purely professional prospective, I have worked in two areas that qualify me for Ross’ job; public relations and the public sector. It should come as no surprise that being a journalist does not exactly pay the bills; as such I have held a fair number of more mundane jobs. My experience with the field of public relations has given me the necessary tools to deal with the press and allowed me to develop the skills necessary to craft and manage a marketing campaign. These are two areas that are invaluable to HBO Boxing, which is in desperate need of a facelift and better relations with the media.
My second area of expertise is far more valuable. I used to work in the administration of one of America’s more prominent former mayors. As someone who dealt with intergovernmental and legislative affairs, I often found myself face to face with obstinate bureaucrats. Believe me; they are worse than promoters in that they have real power. However, I was able to wade my way through the muck and get stuff done. What do I mean by get stuff done? I mean, I was able to coordinate various city agencies and departments and help drawdown funding from the Federal that is far in excess of HBO Boxing’s piddling budget. No promoter is going to pull a fast one on me and no promoter is going to dictate to me how much money they want, because the one thing you learn in government is that the Feds are on top because they have the money. And in the world of boxing, HBO is the Federal government.
I am a boxing fan, something I am not sure Ross is, and, therefore, I actually want to see the best fights. I know what a good style matchup is. I know what fights get the fans excited, because I am one of them and I know that if boxing wants to get back on top, it needs to be made available to people like me. I will force promoters to put fights back in real cities, give us more competitive matchups and let them know that being on television requires more than just one marquee name.
Perhaps, most importantly, when considering me for the position of HBO’s boxing tsar, is that I have balls. Unlike Ross, who is deathly afraid of the promoters, I recognize that HBO owns the sport of boxing in America. No one has more money, no one has more power and no executive has frittered that combination away more than Ross Greenberg. If I were put in Ross’ position I would reign in the budget, tell the promoters bluntly that if they do not give me a good product, they will not be on my network.
What will they do? Hold independent pay-per-views? Take their fights to ESPN2 or Versus? Showtime has already drawn a line in the sand, as evidenced by the “Super Six” and fights like Corrales vs. Castillo and the Vazquez vs. Marquez trilogy. They need HBO, because only HBO can afford to pay the biggest names the biggest purses. Only HBO can deliver pay-per-views that eclipse the one-million-buy mark. Only HBO can afford to keep these fat cats in business.
So, to the board of directors over at Home Box Office, I, not so humbly, submit my application for the position of director of boxing operations at your network. I may not have the experience that Ross does in the corporate sector, but I more than make up for it with passion, fortitude and a perception of the sport grounded in the reality that HBO is the Alpha and Omega of boxing.
