?Freddie Roach is like a Don Rickles joke
The likes of me he will never approach
He can?t go first class, he belongs in coach
His eggs are so scrambled, he don?t know how to poach?
Saying that Floyd Mayweather?s poetry is childish is an insult to kindergarteners everywhere.
He wouldn?t know iambic pentameter if it pimp slapped him. He writes only doggerel but he thinks it?s one of those little jackets French poodles wear in the cold.
But I love this man. I truly do and so should you, Joe Fight Fan, even if you live in Cebu.
There I go, trying to rhyme but committing only crime. I guess we?re all poets and we don?t know it.
Can you imagine how deathly dull the Manny Pacquiao-Ricky Hatton fight buildup would be without the vitriol, the namecalling, the blatant idiocy and all-around clowning of Uncle Floyd?
The principals, the two guys who will pound each other?s cerebellum come May 2, are Nice Guys. One guy is a hero to a large swath of the UK. Pacman is a hero worldwide, an icon to Pinoys no matter their current address.
All that?s nice and tidy but the p.r. crew is so deperate for lively material that they had to stage a darts match in a Hatton friendly pub.
What?s next, Pac vs. Hat in fight week tiddlywinks or Chinese checkers?
Even you diehard Paclanders must see the obvious. Floyd Mayweather Sr. is what Reggie ?Mr. October? Jackson once was to a star-filled New York Yankees lineup.
In this promotion, Mayweather is the straw that stirs the drink. Without him, without the trainer who was taken out of the ghetto but never had the ghetto taken out of him, what have you got?
I’m wonder what happened to Hatton bagboy Lee Beard, the guy who never saw a camera he didn’t like. Evidently, when Boss Floyd landed in the UK, Beard’s media time got trimmed. Do they have a Witless Protection program in England?
Without Madcap Mayweather, what you’ve got is pablum.
Scatch Uncle Floyd and you’re left with a banana smoothie.
It might go down easy, maybe you sprinkle in some goji berries or whatever, but it?s lacking in fire, missing the spice.
Pacquiao used Oscar De La Hoya as a punchbag and I think he will do the same, though not as quickly, to the simplistic style of Hatton. All this talk about a ?new? Ricky in the ring is poppycock.
And, when it?s over, Mayweather?s lips will still be flapping. He won?t praise Megamanny, instead he?ll be saying how Pacman can?t beat no Mayweather.
And that could well be true. Beating a fighter whose cornerman is Mayweather Sr. is one thing while beating a fighter named Floyd Mayweather Jr. is another.
Sit back and enjoy the cartoon antics of this bad cat, Floyd Sr. He is in this promotion for your amusement.
He is the straw that stirs this drink.
The others? They can only stir it boring.
