I hope you got the last part there?plays all regions. Meaning that The White Gorilla is in effect worldwide. Talk about being large and in charge.
But I come before you today, boxing and animal lovers, not as the pasty simian you?ve come to know and despise but as that rara avis, the rare bird who likes both Freddie Roach and Floyd Mayweather Sr., two birds of different feathers who don?t get along together.
Lately, I?ve got a bone to pick with Boston Brother Roach. Make that two bones to pick.
Perhaps his cult figure/hero status as Manny Pacquiao?s chief trainer and strategist has swollen the usually modest Roach?s hat size. If it?s not that, there must be other reasons why Roach has singing off-key.
When some stenographer came to Roach and asked the trainer about a possible Pacman-Oscar de la Hoya fight, Freddie stuttered and sputtered.
Roach said it?s a physical mismatch. Then he said it will never happen. Then he belittled its commercial appeal.
This is what happens when you offer public pronouncements beyond the scope of your expertise and experience. Roach is a trainer, a gymnasium owner and we all respect him for that just as we all especially respect the work he has put into grooming and refining Megamanny. Of course, I must note Roach has been richly rewarded for his services. When he is in the Philippines, people rush to bring their finest wines and cheeses to Mr. Roach.
But, unless I missed something, I?d have to say that Uncle Bob Arum is more of an expert than Professor Roach on what boxing matches will bring in the big bucks. I don?t recall Roach ever running or promoting a single boxing show on his own.
This fight will happen before the end of 2008. Roach is the only voice on the Golden Boy Promotions roster?from Oscar de la Hoya on down?who has made any public comment on this likely to happen megafight. If they deemed it ridiculous, don?t you think Oscar and his henchman Richie Rich Schaefer would?ve shot it full of holes by now?
And no word, discouraging or otherwise, has come from the HBO decision-makers. Can you spell trial baloon? It looks to me like there is plenty of air in this one.
At this point, Oscar seems to be like the penurious (meaning very cheap) old-time comedian jack Benny. Accosted by a gun-wielding robber, Benny was told, ?Your money or your life!?
A lengthy minute of silence goes by. Not a peep from Benny.
?Your money or your life!? the robber shouts again.
?I?m thinking, I?m thinking,? Benny replies.
OK, so maybe it was funnier on radio 60 years ago, even back before the White Gorilla was hatched in the most fearsome of jungles.
That?s what Oscar and Richie Rich are doing now, thinking long, deep thoughts about how oscar figures to beat the smaller Minimanny and how much fabulous moolah is to be earned from the always gullible public.
So, while Roach publicly knocks the product before it goes on the shelves, he will look like a silly boy when Oscar starts stoking the publicity fires to make this fight a reality.
Which brings me to point two. And that is that No Joke Coach Roach also gave the wrong answer when properly asked whether he would work with Pacman or with ODLH if such a fight did materialize.
?Let?s wait and see,? Roach said, or words to that effect.
When Manny-Oscar or Oscar-Manny is announced, Roach will be between the proverbial rock and the hard place. Maginficent trainer Angelo Dundee found himself briefly in such a no comfort zone when promoters matched Muhammad Ali against long-time sparring partner Jimmy Ellis.
I was at that fight in Houston?s Astrodome and I took a photograph, which I hope to unearth soon, of Bert Sugar sans hat. It was like a preview of the ?Ben? and ?Willard? movies if you know what I mean.
But I digress. Dundee had an easy solution. Since he had legal status as the manager of Ellis, he worked Jimmy?s corner and let Bundini Brown and the crew handle Ali?s corner. Ali stopped Ellis in a rather humane manner.
Roach?s immediate answer, given that he acquired his fame and fortune on Pacman?s back, should?ve been that he will have to say sorry, Oscar, but I will have to stick with my Pinoy posse and remain as Manny?s anchor.
Or, if he wants to take a principled stand and make his pocket mad at him, he could curse this terrible mismatch and refuse to participate in it in any role.
It?s not that Roach needs to take any loyalty oath but loyalty is a two-way street. Roach never would?ve got the lucrative job of training Oscar for the Mayweather fight if not for his strong position with Pacquaio.
Oscar could?ve hired any of the 10 trainers around who had never previously hired and then fired to get him battle ready for the losing effort against PBF. He chose Roach mainly, I believe, to gain a tactical advantage over Bob Arum in their then raging legal war over the promotional rights to Pacman.
So there you have it. Two bones do not a turkey make. But Coach Roach needs to slow down and engage mind before opening mouth on prickly issues such as these.
As to whether Manny and Oscar will actually fight, I, for one, don?t want to hear from any monkeys.
I want to hear from the organ-grinders.
And the organ-grinders? names are Pacquiao and de la Hoya.
Happy Thanskgiving to one and all and, please, try some of our delicious White Gorilla stuffing. It?s fantastic with cranberry sauce but, then again, so is vodka, Sky-Osk!
