Give colleague John Chavez credit. Hours before our Boxingconfidential drug/alcohol ?intervention? worked and Ricardo Lois personally took him to that Utah rehab center where Ms. Spears and Ms. Lohan go to clean up, Chavez not only banged out a story in which he correctly showed through Tales Of The Tape that Jermain Taylor?s arm length has shrunk 3 ? inches, he also came up with a Top Ten list of why B.P. Barrera will beat Manny Pacquaio.
Oh, btw, the B.P. stands for Battered Performer. As for Taylor?s shrinking appendages, I hope Lou DiBella sends the Arkansas middleweight to the finest doctors. I can?t remember someone?s arm getting so short so quick since the Mayweather-De La Hoya fight when I took Rick, John and some just out of prison pal of John?s to the high-piced steakhouse at the MGM Grand. When the $800 tab came due (six bottles of wine will do that), Lois had alligator arms which could not get anywhere close to the check.
I?d say that, if Chavez was playing for the Giants, he?d be batting .500 and headed, steroid free we hope, to Cooperstown. Dead right on the Taylor arm length going from 27 inches to 23 ? and dead wrong on the cockamamie list of foolish reasons why Barrera will win.
So, while Chavez is 12 Stepping in Mormonland, herewith are the Top Ten Reasons why Pacquaio will win:
Like Muhammad Ali, Manny thrives from dissension and distractions. Quick, somebody sue the Pacman becaue peace in the valley disturbs him.
Megamanny carries a whole nation on his back just like Julio Cesar Chavez did. I don?t know why Marco Antonio has never resonated like that with his own people?is he perceived as too intelligent or a bit snobbish??but he is not carrying all of Mexico on his back in this fight.
Referee Tony Weeks, fair and competent and a third man who does not seek the limelight, is cognizant that Barrera is a Hall Of Fame shoo-in. This ref will not let the legend get unnecessarily hurt on his watch. Forget all those ?going out on your shield? nonsense. If Pacman is blitzing MAB, Weeks will intercede.
All of Manny?s so-called distractions have not tripped him up yet. The betting the pool hall hours, the karaoke bars, a few dozen San Miguel beers here and there?don?t add up to a loss against a diminished Barrera. Said ?distractions? might matter if the opponent was JM Marquez, Joan Guzman or someone else. And I say that with no disrespect to MAB.
His secretive agent, Michael Koncz, has made a huge wager on Pacman to win. A fellow Canadian asked the agent what odds he got and, from force of habit, Koncz replied, ?Puck, puck and a half.? Too much Inside Hockey, eh? Someone translate that into Tagalog quick.
Freddie Roach, Freddie Roach, Freddie Roach?the coach who is no joke. He may not be the world?s best trainer but he is perfect for Megamanny.
Barrera goes to sleep at night contemplating retirement while Pacman goes into a deep sleep thinking about winning here and moving on. Pacman is Primetime while Barrera is like the milk carton with the gone past sell by date on the side.
Pacquaio aches for increase fame and fortune. Deep in his Aztec soul, Barrera knows he has climbed all the fistic mountains that he will ever climb. Pacman?s ascent continues while Barrera is in an elevator dropping faster than the subprime mortgage market.
John Chavez picked Barrera. This is the same guy who picked the Mets to win the 2007 World Series. He?s tabbed so many losers I think his middle name is Jonah. If he is a boxing bookie, then I will win the Wurlitzer Price this year. The only thing shrinking faster than Taylor?s arm measurement is Chavez?s boxing betting funds. Our hero is nearing zero.
I ran out of reasons, even semi-rational ones. Pacman by TKO in seven. I?m hoping my pal, Attorney Jackal, lays down that bet with the $25,000 I wired to him in Cebu.
