Caveat Emptor. Rack em up. Do whatever it takes.
Wise words, eh? At least, two of them are. Latin para-garble they might be, but when the net is closing and your options are shutting down you?d do well to remember their meaning. Caveat Emptor is a warning to purchasers everywhere and when you look up the translation, take a minute or two to reflect on it. Then mail a 10? x 10? pizza box straight to Jarrell Miller?s H.Q. with those two words written in bold italics on the front and back?we need to make sure the message hits home.
It?s no real news. By now you?ll know that Miller flunked a VADA test and, as I write (16.00, GMT, 18/4/19) his ?B? sample is being slathered over lab surfaces and people with many, many letters after their names wince down eyepieces that can see the shoe size of any given parasite in your intestines. Technology is a marvelous thing, ain?t it? I read today that scientific brethren have reanimated a series of pig brains four hours postmortem. And they kind of still ?worked.? Imagine the theological consequences of that. Jarrell is not the kind of man to think of consequences, and if he had an interest in science then he should have studied harder.
Being caught twice as a drug cheat is bad. It?s low-life bad in a sport like ours where the consequences of advancing?chemically speaking?the edge over your opponent could mean brain damage or death to him/her. Boxing always floats on that grey line between acceptability and barbarism. And when you?re knocking the shit out of somebody?s head, I figure it?s pretty important that you take the rules seriously. Miller?appeal of the ?B? sample pending?clearly hasn?t. And if that second sample comes back positive then he should be hounded out of the sport like a junkyard rodent. There should be no third chance for born liars when lives are on the line.
It?s ironic that the three heavyweights who?ve all called Anthony Joshua a drug abuser in some form or another are: Jarrell Miller, Tyson Fury, and Dillian Whyte. All three are convicted drug cheats and have served bans for it. Man?..I?m almost too angry to type. Really. What the fuck is happening to boxing that makes somebody forget to read a label, or accept a strange tasting drink from an angry and jealous brother-in-law, or eat wild boar testicles to such an amount that rumors fly around you have to have your newly growing lower canine tusks rasped down on a monthly basis? Pack it in?.ALL of you! Stop cheating!
Eddie Hearn won?t be as angry as Joshua about all of this. They were made to look like schoolboys being rinsed for pocket money by the bigger boys when Wilder stepped all over the unification bout talks and played the media like Charlie Parker played his sax on a clean day. Matchroom came away from that debacle whipped and bloody. And Eddie doesn?t forget shame like that easily. Now Miller has left the champ dangling. Rumor is that Luis Ortiz is being lined up as a last minute(ish) replacement. If a step down at world level from Miller was possible at heavyweight, they?ve found the bottom of the barrel is this is true. Old man Ortiz is?well?..it?s kind of laughable if it goes ahead.
I despair.
